I'm feeling a little lonely for the first time since I got here. I think it's because I've been trying to pack social spots into a bit of every day, and today I've perhaps encountered three or four other people and said maybe fifteen words to them. I finished my submission for school yesterday, which I'm proud of since it's due tomorrow. But as I'm checking on my finances and because I don't yet know what I'll be making tutoring, I avoided spending anything today. Sadly, that means I stayed home.
I hate the fact that sometimes, in order for me to feel I'm part of society, I have to go out and buy something. A coffee, an ice cream, a slice of pizza - anything that gets me out and involved with society. Even if I don't actually meet anyone, those few encounters fulfill my social needs. For example, on Friday I sat at Taste coffee shop and had several short conversations with the cute barista, a mother and her four year old daughter, and an adorable old couple who marveled over the design the barista made in the cream and foam of their cappuccino. On Saturday, after elbowing past book fanatics at a local library book sale, I had a lovely conversation with a man at Lincoln Street coffee shop about Russian literature (he saw my Chekhov book). I don't know why these interactions keep me going, but they do.
It seems sort of a funny thing to budget for: Rent, Groceries, Social Time. But perhaps until I get moving on my internship and job, it will be a worthwhile investment. And, since I don't know anyone yet to meet at bars, movies, and the like, I don't really have much of an entertainment cost at the moment. But as soon as I do start doing those things, I won't have to depend on chance encounters with strangers to fill my social cup. Although, of course, I will still need my coffee shop fill every now and again. Old habits die hard.
No comments:
Post a Comment